Success is Easy! Getting People to Shut Up, Listen, and Take Action is the Hard Part!
I was in a bind.
For my first article in 2009, I kicked around a whole bunch of
training topics that I wanted to write about to set the New Year off
right. So many topics popped up in my head, I didn’t know which one
would be the best one to start with because they were all good ideas.
Then I thought back to a conversation I had last week.
One day after training, I was sitting around talking with a couple
of my training partners and students. One of them asked me why it
takes so long to be successful in BJJ.
My response was that being successful in BJJ really isn’t hard; the
hard part is getting the students to shut up, listen, and do what
they’re told to do. Of course, that caused a little stir among the
group because they thought I was suggesting that BJJ wasn’t physically
and mentally demanding or that it didn’t require lots of time and
commitment on the mat. Once I assured them that wasn’t what I meant, I
began to clarify my point.
Success in BJJ (or in life in general) really isn’t hard to
accomplish. If you want to become successful in any particular area of
your life, look for someone who has done what you’re trying to do and
model their behavior. That’s simple, right?
Right…well, kinda sorta!
The hard part comes when the individual’s ego gets in the way and
they are reluctant to stop acting like a know-it-all, even when they’re
searching for help. All too often, people searching for answers feel
like the person they’re learning from has to be as smart or as
accomplished as they are, in order to be believed as an expert. And if
the expert doesn’t meet their internal standard, learning is hindered.
If the know-it-all could:
- Admit that they are in need of help, even if they are the smartest person in the room;
- Find the humility to ask an expert for help;
- Shut up and listen to what the expert recommends they do;
- Do exactly what they were told to do by the expert instead of trying to find fault or challenge their knowledge;
- Get feedback to make sure they’re doing it right if the advice given isn’t bring the desired results;
- Work hard;
- Repeat cycle as needed until goal is achieved.
They would find that success would eventually find them because the
formula works, even if you have to repeat certain steps to work out a
few bugs.
Unfortunately, most people never get past the know-it-all stage
because they like to either hear themselves talk or do it “their way”.
Some would rather walk through unclear woods instead of following a
clear trail that’s assured to get them where they want to go.
I guess success just isn’t for everyone. Does that include you?
