Vocabulary Rehabilitation
Swearing is, well, a bit of a curse. Those who litter
their speech with swearwords may hardly notice they are doing it, but
everyone listening to them does - and, even if only subconsciously,
takes what's being said less seriously.
What
comes out of your mouth generally reflects the kind of person you are
and sets the stage for how people respond to you. Using foul language
gives the message that you have a lack of restraint and
professionalism, and inadvertently projects that you have no respect
for yourself or the others involved in a conversation.
Using
swearwords can easily become a habit. If it's one of yours, consider
adding breaking it to your list of New Year's resolutions.
Spot the Potty Mouth
As
with all bad habits, the first step to overcoming the problem is
recognizing that you have one. Listen to your own speech, ask people
whether they think your swearing is out of hand, or even record a
conversation and listen to it afterwards. If every second word is a
swearword then you have a problem.
It's also
important to understand why you swear. Most people associate swearing
with anger or frustration, but we do it for a number of reasons and in
various situations, and it's usually reinforced by the company we keep
and people we're trying to identify with. Figure out what triggers your
foul mouth by writing a list of what sets you off - for instance
specific people, traffic or work frustrations. Consider ways to better
cope with these situations, such as being more positive or not rising
to the bait when someone nags you.
Keep in mind
why you want to stop. The key ingredient to getting over swearing is
really wanting to do it. Motivate yourself by writing down all the
reasons you want to stop, and read it whenever you're feeling the
pressure and want to give up.
Swallow your Words
While
this preparation may get you on the right track, reaching your goal
will depend on determination and self-restraint. Here are some tips to
help you hold your tongue:
The hardest thing
about not swearing is having to substitute profanities with other
words, especially when your conversation sounds duller without them.
Civilized and respectful conversation does not involve a swearing
contest, and you owe it to yourself to use a vast vocabulary to
fill up your conversations. When you want to swear, make a point of
trying to find alternative words or phrases. This will help you
maintain your normal sentence structure even when you eliminate
swearwords.
Ask for help from friends and family
who never or seldom swear. They might have some good advice for you
and, if nothing else, can give you a small pinch as a reminder whenever
you slip up.
Use the counting strategy. If you
want to swear because something has upset you, take a moment and count
to 10 while taking deep breaths. Not only will it calm you down, it
will also give you some time to think of something better to say.
Realize
that habits are second-nature characteristics and won't disappear
overnight. Don't beat yourself up if you slip up. It just means that
you are easing out of your old habit slowly and encountering a few
glitches along the way. As you would during dieting, pick yourself up
and make a fresh start from that moment of relapse.